Taking it day by day: Tight, tighter?



Tight, tighter?

Early this year when I was in Kenya I found myself in a shop that sold all kinds of things - from perfume to buttons, underwear to make-up, bridal tiaras to buibuis, beads to sequins. I am busy looking at the beads and buttons, don't even ask why, I just love looking at them...then comes this attendant holding something in her hand.

She smiles, I smile and then she goes ahead to market her product. "Auntie, kuna hii sabuni naona itakufaa. Bei yake nafuu!" OK, so they sell soap too! Cool! I ask her what kind of soap it is...I thought maybe it is an antiseptic sabuni like dettol, or maybe it has stuff like olive oil, milk and honey which make your skin smooth. The attendant smiles and with a low voice goes on to tell me ni sabuni ya kule chini. I almost blurted "chini wapi?" then it hit me.

I had to smile. I went on to ask her what is so good about the soap, she seemed uncomfortable with having to explain about her *magic bar-o-soap* but I stood there waiting, feigning interest. She told me you use the soap to wash the vagina so that it can become tight! I looked at her like *you are kidding me, right?* She went on to say that it really works - I had to ask her if she had tried it, she said no, not yet but she was planning to buy it and use it. I looked at the bar, it just smelled like kawa sabuni with lots of perfume, a flowery cover and a promise to get your thingy tighter than tight!

I left the shop wondering how many women have bought that *sabuni ya kule chini* in an attempt to tighten things up! Who would be that gullible to believe that sabuni can do such miracles? I just wonder.
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21 Comments:

At August 11, 2006 4:46 PM, Blogger Acolyte said...

I have heard those soaps do make things tighter but at the same time mess up with the natural fluid production so their use is highly discouraged by gynaes.Hmmmm the things people come up with to make money.Some kegel's would do the same job for free!

 
At August 11, 2006 5:08 PM, Blogger CiikuMrsBabes said...

Can we just say KEGAL EXERCISES????

 
At August 11, 2006 9:11 PM, Blogger Chatterly said...

Acolyte...I am yet to meet someone who will tell me that she used it and it tightened her up.(and even then i wouldnt believe her 100%) I can't imagine myself with all those soap suds down there all rubbing and hoping for a miracle bana, what about the irritation afterwards?

Very true about the Kegel exercises...they work wonders, won't irritate and they cost nothing:-)

 
At August 11, 2006 9:51 PM, Blogger Kelitu said...

Okay they have these weights that they sell for tightening the cat-trap. You insert one in and do the kegel exercise. I have a pal who swears by them.

 
At August 11, 2006 11:09 PM, Blogger Chatterly said...

Lol @ cat-trap! tena about inserting weights? how many gramms are we talking about? them kegels I know, you just exercise the muscles down there, bila weights bila insertions! heh dunia ni mviringo kweli!

 
At August 12, 2006 1:58 PM, Blogger akiey said...

Truly amazing the kinds of products available out here...just when you think you've seen them all!? Okay, just wondering if this stuff really works...

 
At August 12, 2006 6:24 PM, Blogger Nakeel said...

Just ask me how many have seen them stand at thecounter and say I want the V soap very beautiful gals and mamas are competing for the products but they dont know the negative side of them..call the curiosity

 
At August 12, 2006 9:01 PM, Blogger Chatterly said...

I can't see myself going to a shop telling an attendant "give me that small bottle of ladygay and that V-soap"!!! eishhh too much!

As long as people keep buying these *wonder products*, there is noway of stopping their production-no matter what kind of side-effects the cause.

 
At August 13, 2006 4:15 PM, Blogger AK said...

any for enlarging the ding-a-ling so that tightening becomes unnecessary? just a thought

 
At August 14, 2006 11:21 AM, Blogger Chatterly said...

Thanx for stopping by ak...za kuenlarge dingaling ziko,i get offers to *impress my girlfriend with my big dong* via yahoo...tsk tsk.

 
At August 14, 2006 9:29 PM, Blogger Spidey/Tato said...

i thot kegels were just for dudes?

guys will sell anything out there..and the funny thing people will buy even if they know its fake...coz if it were to work out-they'd be the winners!

u chics shud do a ka-research hee hee

 
At August 15, 2006 11:06 AM, Blogger Girl in the Meadow said...

I have seen those soaps even in supermarkets in Nairobi to be specific Ebrahims

Aai Aco you have too much information kijana. Where from?

Kegels;mmh

ON your last post i know when you gain weight for nothing, i am a recipient and your brother's dude is a typical Kenyan men stingy style. Shame on him!!!

 
At August 15, 2006 11:06 AM, Blogger Girl in the Meadow said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At August 15, 2006 2:15 PM, Blogger Chatterly said...

nick, kegels are also for chicks, and about doing research??? heheheh i won't play lab-rat to get my thingy all sore...i'd stick to the kegels.

Shiro-same thing i said about that dude....shame shame! about the weight...wacha tu!

 
At August 16, 2006 1:40 AM, Blogger Kelitu said...

I forget how many lbs each weight is but the heaviest is about 3lbs. She swears by them.

 
At August 22, 2006 3:29 PM, Blogger Prousette said...

Gynaes advise against unsettling the delicate balance of the fluids za huko chini and no one listens.

Those soaps do not work, someone tried selling me a "chumvi" which is supposed to do the same thing as the soap.

Kegels and exercise for the whole body work well without any unpleasant side effects.

 
At August 22, 2006 4:54 PM, Blogger Chatterly said...

Prousette, how kwani you nolonger have your blog? coz kila time i click your link it semas blog onge....sad :-(

 
At February 28, 2007 4:11 PM, Blogger Grizzly said...

To say the truth, maybe that chille wit the wonder soap after she took a peep at you, she thought that u is a hoe,n as we al know down there wit hoes its not aka gud sight 2 watch, maybe she thought she was helpin u by goin the extra mile of sellin u that wonder soap

 
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